This work provides an analysis for the civil engineering community of the practice of participatory modelling (PM), reviewing the advances that environmental researchers and practitioners have made over 20 years, providing key references, case studies, and practical guidelines. Past consultation methods have proven inadequate to build trust with communities, and have led to development of PM to improve engagement. Three lessons from PM are emphasised: (1) listen to stakeholders to better understand the system, (2) collaborate with stakeholders to better model the system, and (3) co-decide on actions to better empower and engage stakeholders. Advice on the key aspects to consider when designing a PM process is summarised. The challenges and obstacles to progress are analysed for PM in civil engineering applications. PM appears to be of greater value in larger projects involving complex socio-technical systems. The incorporation of PM within civil engineering work will be more useful to society when civil engineers understand better the operation of PM.